Love

I'm listening to matchbox 20 and other 90's rock groups taking in all my emotions at once. The songs take me to every memory i have. It creates a movie in my head. the kind you'd see as a wedding video. Happy times with the movie specks showing it was filmed with a hand held camerra. Except mine has good, bad, great, low, and all in between. I'm in love with life to the fullest possible extent. There is so much to offer and thankfully I have an imagination that can take me to the highest cliffs over the calmest seas, with the tallest clouds and and the addiction of traveling I have. Of discovering. Of learning. I'm in love with someone I'm forbidden to be with but I can be happy for now. I'm enjoy all the feelings that come with it. And it saddens me to think that I would leave everything in my life behind to travel. I could pack up now and leave. The pain is only temporary and will disapperate once I see the Eiffel Tower or La Sangrada Familia or The great Wall of China. I'm sure it will creep it's way back up as I'd lie in bed at night, my mind unoccupied by the beauty of culture's I have yet to discover. But for now, I stay put. I'm only restricted so much as to where I'm a student looking for the broadest learning. Which I have found, but then again, I haven't.

I can help

I miss you when you're not with me,
it's like I can't breathe,
I weep silently to myself,
and the rain falls surrounding everyone else,
I smile when I see your face,
the sunshine is out again,
I can help you find love
in this heart so old,
my eyes will show you all you
ever need to know

The Little Moments

Laying in bed, thinking of everything, I've come to a conclusion.
The tiniest moments of us with our hands folded across our foreheads,
biting our lips we come to realize some of our biggest answers.
In face, it's in the littlest moments that we realize some of our biggest
conclusions to things we'd never thought we'd answer.
Now, my first love used me for benifits and that hurt like hell.
It's been a little over 2 months since our breakup and I'll spare details
because this is not about the pain, this is about me coming into myself
for the first time, for appreciating myself,
thinking outside of my mind,
in this tiny moment thinking, "I'm happy with myself. If I knew me I would be proud to know me"
And honestly, I think everyone should come to that place when they can.
It's a marvelous place to be, because (and I did just explain this to a friend whos going through the same troubles in love) there will always be people like that in life.
But you have to decide who you want to be. You have to choose what to do with your experiences. You have to write your worries in sand and your lessons in stone.
And you know, it comes down to your most honest moments.
And I believe, Love is all you need.
But now I'm experiencing a whole new meaning to those simple lyrics.
It doesn't have to mean true, prince charming married cinderalla love,
or family love, but more so loving yourself. Trying to be the best you that you can be.
And I realize now that sometimes loving yourself is the best gift you can give and recieve. Now I don't think only "One day I'll find someone who treats me right".
Because that person before anyone else who should treat me right is the person I see in the mirror every morning. I should look forward to making myself happy. I want to grow a garden when Im older, for my great aunt. I want to design my own home, to be happy, even if I grow old alone. Because I'm perfectly fine with that. Of course love of another will come and go and I may find the right person for me. But right now, that's myself. And I think the more people realize how amazing they can be, the more they will be surprized at what can be concluded in the littlest, tiniest moments.

Born Again

I'm a guardian, spreading my wings,
taking off for flight,
i watch over my cliffs
day and night,
i spread my toes, my claws come out,
im born again without a doubt,
the wind through my hair,
flustering my eyes,
i look up to the sky and then down below,
to the water and follow the direction
it flows,
the sun beams in my eyes,
my wings are heavy now,
I land on a mountain
then dive again,
im born, over and over,
born again

Flying Sheets

Can our spirits inter-connect in a way most people don't understand? Now I'm not talking about your flying white sheets with holes for eyes. I'm talking about the energy that flows between us. Science says that energy cannot be created or destroyed..and have proved that emotion is a form of energies that can be transferred from one person to another. Would it make sense that when a new life is formed, that it borrows energy from the universe but eventually you have to give it back. Can people who are really connected with their inner spirit, reconize the different energies of the world, and really connect with other's inner spirits?

Just In Case

There are two things you should never get into heated discussions about:politics and religion. But let's focus on religion. Some people revolve their whole lives around it, while others think it's a waste of time. They strive to do things society tends to frown upon, because they believe it's better to bargain with the devil. Well, let's look at what most religous people are trying to make sure to get to: heaven. Or some place where everything is perfect. Say that religion and God is just a conspiracy; would living a meaningful and good life be so bad? We all affect the life of another person and another and so on and so on. We can't just be reckless and uncaring because someone else should not have to pay for another persons choice. If we live a great and kind and caring and meaning full life, yet there is no heaven awaiting, well then what do we have to loose? There is only one life that we can remember while we are living it. So why not try to make it count?

Lessons Not Taught

Our schools teach us some things we need to know, our parents teach us what we don't learn in school. What about what our parents and schools don't teach us?
Our schools teach us that there are tricks and loopholes in everything.
Our parents teach us there are strangers around the corner at every street stop. Just waiting, and waiting to snatch someone vulnerable up.
But what almost noone teaches us, and leaves us to learn on our own, are the people that can do the most damage, are the closest to home.
We think we know someone then they turn around, and rip up everything we've built up from the ground.
They betray us and lie, when we thought they'd stay by our side. They cheat and leave, and just about everything in between, because, the ugly truth, is that people closest to us can hurt us more then anything any stranger would do.