Laying in bed, thinking of everything, I've come to a conclusion.
The tiniest moments of us with our hands folded across our foreheads,
biting our lips we come to realize some of our biggest answers.
In face, it's in the littlest moments that we realize some of our biggest
conclusions to things we'd never thought we'd answer.
Now, my first love used me for benifits and that hurt like hell.
It's been a little over 2 months since our breakup and I'll spare details
because this is not about the pain, this is about me coming into myself
for the first time, for appreciating myself,
thinking outside of my mind,
in this tiny moment thinking, "I'm happy with myself. If I knew me I would be proud to know me"
And honestly, I think everyone should come to that place when they can.
It's a marvelous place to be, because (and I did just explain this to a friend whos going through the same troubles in love) there will always be people like that in life.
But you have to decide who you want to be. You have to choose what to do with your experiences. You have to write your worries in sand and your lessons in stone.
And you know, it comes down to your most honest moments.
And I believe, Love is all you need.
But now I'm experiencing a whole new meaning to those simple lyrics.
It doesn't have to mean true, prince charming married cinderalla love,
or family love, but more so loving yourself. Trying to be the best you that you can be.
And I realize now that sometimes loving yourself is the best gift you can give and recieve. Now I don't think only "One day I'll find someone who treats me right".
Because that person before anyone else who should treat me right is the person I see in the mirror every morning. I should look forward to making myself happy. I want to grow a garden when Im older, for my great aunt. I want to design my own home, to be happy, even if I grow old alone. Because I'm perfectly fine with that. Of course love of another will come and go and I may find the right person for me. But right now, that's myself. And I think the more people realize how amazing they can be, the more they will be surprized at what can be concluded in the littlest, tiniest moments.
